I'm not bullet proof

On a one fine day, I felt utterly great like I could just do about anything and take things by the bull and by the horn…

I thought of ‘Things’ and ‘People’ that deprived me from getting my ‘Sunlight’ and I want back my laughter and have a good time like I used to be. I’m in charge of myself and I must control not to flop sided or cry silently in the dark corner.

I was having so much pressure at home and becoming a punching bag to their wrong doings and faults though I’m not free from making mistakes too. Life is totally different from my parents’ view and expectation….everything is pre-plan…everything is speed…everything is calculated…and judged. Though they are my parents and I respect them, someone should advise them to just enjoy life as it is and live gracefully. They have and had their days and all their children are ok.

My honey, who was raised from a different wave of speed (life) is more relax, hoping that I would adopt his well being. But sometimes, my upbringing burns the patience in me…that day I had the courage to inform him what went through my head. I was afraid to speak out and made him thinking that I’m alright and I can take any strides but I’m not….(Sorry honey). He’s my pillar of strength who keeps me on and on and on…but if the pillar builds on a shaking ground, it will eventually fall sooner or later….He said; “ Love, you are still my honey bun” and he smiled. I was totally glad and showered him with hugs and kisses…xoxoxoxo…I got my sunshine and rainbow too…there was misty in my eyes …I don’t think I can go through without his supports and understandings and I don’t want him to think that I’m pulling him to the ground or a burden to him. Also, I want him to know, I need him because he is the essence of my perfection and to wash away the pain.

Now, some you guys out there who think that they can buy my friendliness and thought that I can take just any punch from your inconsiderate attitude…keeping me on hold…broken promises…telling tales…pretending nothing had happened…luring me to your schemes…rotten language…trying out…thinking I had or I am not aware…well, you are wrong!

I won’t open the door each time you ring my door bell…you may stay out in the rain

However...I'm not bullet proof