Brotherly Love

What a hilarious trip Yuna had yesterday! Yuna, relatives and a bunch of goones cousins went for an engagement occasion. As usual, I'm ever ready when needed. My cousins whom are mostly of male genders. Perhaps due to the fact that there are only 4 roses among the torns....well, we girls are always given a special treatment. It is wonderful to get special attention from these brotherly love.

My cousin, Syed Ahmed Shahrol, is in love! Yeah...head over heel in love that he wanted to be engage to his beloved. So we went to Bagan Serai (a small town in Perak) for the engagement's ceremony... a malay custom still practise till to date. Earlier one cousin told me that it'll be at "Tanjung Malim" and the other night was "Sabak Bernam". Thats the reasons I call them a bunch of goones!! Shahrol, leading us the way took a bunch of wagons a merry-go-round-the-bush! Can't imagine the elders had for a spin! Oh brother....

We laughed and the jokes was on Shahrol himself.

Dear Shahrol...you grow up too fast dear! I hope you find peace and love in your new future life. Don't ever change! We still love your brotherly attention. Yeah...we know...we know...we're going to miss our crazy bunch of mischief when all of us get together. We all love you dearly!!

Server down

The Managing Editor, Alan, asked me on why I haven't replied his email on the word puzzle. "Don't you like word puzzle anymore?". Told him that I was busy with my blog (oh yeah?), such a lame excuses actually. But really! I was about to start blogging the moment he came to me. An Australian boss from the other wing who knows malay language...so beware and watch your mouth. He's the only boss who often send me a friendly secret mission mail. I'll catch up with you later, Alan!

Last night the internet service provider was down. So no chit-chat and surfing. What a lonely night. Went to bed early but woke up at 11 to check if I could get online again but in vain. Called Streamyx who said that my password was invalid. Ha?? Is that so? Told me to log in with a new password to which I did but nothing happens. Its going to be midnight and have been listening to all the songs dearie have given me and my final fantasies'. We text and talk for awhile before surrending ourselves into the midnight dreams.

The night was beautiful and peaceful....it only takes a server to bring the whole house down! Oh brother!

Sealed with a kiss

"Do not dodge!Smoochie!" his trade mark...he can't do away without it no more. It was hilarious whenever he addresses his grand finale with that smoochie. Me? I have none (trade mark). I wouldn't even dare to leave a smoochie goodbye....don't want to seen as over powering his favourite emoticon. Besides, it is his way of fun thingy. Hmmm.... what shall I do to beat his fun game?

So last night, since I senses his off guard...sleepy head ...Sorry dear, between you and I...looks like I'm Princess Charming and you are Prince Cinderella all the time. You always seem to leave behind your glass boot for me to pick up! "Manje sungguh!" a malay words for a spoilt brat. So I replied with a smoochie too. Just for that night, giving him a chance for "whatever" is like to say good night sealed with a kiss. Ha..ha..ha...ha...ooo what a night! Laughing out loud plus blushing with guilt. I think he was hopping mad as he didn't expect any returns from me and said he'll be back with a vengence!

I bet he was laughing too!!

Tidus

Hello Tidus! It has been long I haven't played Final Fantasy 10. It was wonderful to have you right from the beginning. A young blitzball star player from Zanarkand Abes. I've tried to play this game (blitzball) but I'm not good at all. I've tried many times ...I guess this is a man's game. I felt so sad when you found out that you're just part of the myth's dream to exist. It is not fair to Yuna. It was such a terrible feeling when you have to fade away in the end of FF10. I cried...Oh man!! this is embarassing! Square Enix is really good at producing an adventurous game filled with romance and tragedy. Long live Final Fantasy!!

Now back to my real life! Last night was a quiet one. Don't want to be disturbed at all. All I did was browsing to do some research to post for my favourite forum, find some ideas for my other blogs or perhaps I'm ready for a website. Still there's so much learn and understanding to do. All these are new to me. But last night was really a dead end research. Not one product was to my satisfaction. Have I lost my touch? Then I yearn to chat with my dearie for a while...maybe too tired of all these rubbish or nonsense I went through. Unfortunately he's on the road... a long way home. Hmmm...no more waiting. Best I go for my fantasy dream and close my case for the day.

Tidus, I pray for your safe returns in your long journey late at night. Take care dear!

Hurtful feeling

People easily tend to hurt the people who are closer to you or cares. Maybe a person think that it is ok because it is easily to take for granted that they'll be there and understanding. Strange isn't it? How many times can you accept the hurtful feeling from someone you really cares. Does that compensate your relationship? I've been in that shoes before and I don't want to be in that situation again. I gives I care as much as I could give. I gave too many the last time and it hurts so much, left me in the cold rain. Puzzled and confused, I was left with an open wound. The healing process was rather slow.

Well, no matter how sincere I am...I will not let another scar to my heart. If I'm hurt I will voice out my opinion. Take it or leave it. At least, I know where I stand. I'd just leave if the situation does not permit. I feel better this way....It hurts but there won't be an open wound. But it takes a strong guts to build Yuna's strength to come forward and say out loud. Because deep in my heart, I care. It hurts whatever it is...it hurts still........but I cares (fullstop!)

Never mind

If you're down and sad...reminising back old times...things you really miss.
It something I can't quite explain....
Trying to surface when you feel like drowning in the sea of sorrow.
Very difficult to understand...I'll never understand.
Will never never never try to understand anymore.
???

To be or not to be that is the question...words that came out from Hamlet's mouth.
Or "whatever" it may be...I always say it
My killer word, my saviour word or my funny word...it doesn't matter anymore

Yuna!!! wait up! What are you going to do with those spheres?
"You can find it all over the Spira!" she said.
Just never mind......

Calling you - Blue October

I like this song very much! I hope you enjoy the scene from the Final Fantasy 7, The Advent Children.

Team Spirit

Hello Wakka! The guy in the blue head band you see in this picture. He's the captain of Besaid Aurochs' Blitzball Team. Under his management the team believes in him that they can win if they do their best. Then Tidus fits into the picture, the one on the left, a Zanarkand's Blitzball star player. With his skills, strong personality encourage Wakka and the team that teamwork and believing in oneself to win as well!

You see it everyday. The people whom you work and interact with. The people around you and related to you. The people whom you care. There is always 'something' that brought you to this circle of people. Yes, your spirit, to give and to share with. You believe in yourself subconsciously. Unaware that your team spirit mingling in that circle of people and friends. Hey, did I wake you up and now you're just thinking about it?

I like to help around sincerely. I'd try to lift up one's spirit when he or she is down. No matter how bad the situation is, there is always a solution to get out of the black hole. It's ok if to retrieve once awhile and then get out of your system. It is not about yourself but your circle, your spirit in the circle as a whole.

Squall thank you for sharing!

Talks

My dad has been discharged. Huh? I was suprised to hear from him when I was on the way to the hospital with mum and grandma yesterday evening. That afternoon, I rushed home. I had some naps before getting ready for another half of the day. My brain has set the time and schedules for the day. I am always like this...always plan ahead. Yes, in whatever I do...whatever! Maybe I have to learn to relax but how?

Looks like dad's surgery will be held on the 6th of April. He was cheerful when he saw us coming. He is a quiet man like me but yesterday he talk and talk and talk. Me? Oh my god my dad's next bed man was a handsome young dude. He kept looking and smiling. I just smiled when my dad introduced him to me. We talk awhile and thanked him for keeping my dad accompany. He told us the agony my father had that morning and was a hanky panky thingy at the ward. Oh man...that doesn't sound like him at all. I feel sorry for my dad. "Imran", he said. Huh? my mind was blurred for awhile. Oh, I'm Yuna...said briefy and shying away. Come on Yuna this guy need a lady to cheer him up too...Oh yeah? Then, there was a call...my ardent admirer, Syed, who is ever at her majesty's service if I needed him. Told him my dad was alright and we're bringing him home. He will drop by our house to visit my dad soon. Oh brother! whatever Syed....whatever!

On our way home, I text Squall. I needed a distraction for awhile. What a day and I was worn out. Syed, my chinese brother,Adnan and his wife came. All those talkings of yikkity-yak sound like noises to me. I went to my room closed my eyes and listened to my MP3....aaaa....Final Fantasy...the music and songs are my savior for the evening.

Afraid and Alone

Squall don't like what I wrote yesterday. Especially going separate ways....leaving sweet memories behind. Oh Brother! I'm not leaving now...not even sooner nor later. I don't even know when but Yuna was just being realistic. Come on!

I'll be busy today until Sunday. Yuna's dad is in hospital for a surgery. So I'll be preoccupied going tru and fro the hospital. Yuna once was hospitalised before. Didn't want anybody to come. My siblings, they live far and hence they just called to wish me well. Can't believe that I was totaly on my own for 4 days. I kept myself busy with lots of readings. I thought I was able to coupe up but in the end I felt so lonely. On the 5th day, my dad came. It was late evening, he just got back from Sarawak. I was glad to see a familiar face and I cried. Told him I don't want to be like the others (patients) and whatever sickness or pain they have to endure. I want to go home soon. I saw tears swelling in his eyes but he looked away. His face turned red hindering his tears from flowing out or perhaps his male egoness trying not to give in. Today, I'll cheer him up......well, everday. Dad, be strong..I know that you're afraid. I've been there before!! This time you won't be alone.

Oh yes, Thanks for your support Squall!

Yuna's real live Final Fantasy

Hello! Yuna is back! Feeling much better today. Yesterday, maybe Yuna was in pain and blue....perhaps a little bit disappointed with myself. Squall text me last night while I was watching CSI, my favourite TV programme. We went online and talk...we never have this longest chat online during weekdays before. He was just trying to console me and willing to lend his shoulder to cry on....till I'm feeling better and ok. Usually he gives in but last night he stayed. Thank you, Squall.

I think we're good at these...luring out whatever been pressured that bottles up in our chest. We look for each other to console, giving out opinions and advises. They think we're love birds? Please don't get us wrong. We've already draw our line of friendship. That gives our freedom to express whatever matters to discuss and the fun we have coying each other. We're just in the same boat where we're able to sit comfortably together and chat without feeling guilty of one another....until our boat reach the destination where perhaps we might go our separate ways. Leaving behind sweet memories and momentos of this great adventure, Yuna's real live Final Fantasy.

Squall or Tidus, if you read this. Yuna thank you so much!

"To Zanarkand" (FF10)

Deliverance

Not another Monday blues...no...no...I didn't get up from the wrong side up bed today. Everything was fine until I reached the office. I felt like my skin thickening and my body trembles. The aching and my head throbbing in pain. The side effect if I didn't take my medication. You must be wondering if I'm sick. Yes, Yuna is sick dear. Sometimes I feel that I can go through all these and fight, just like the summoner, Yuna Braska in FF10. Sometimes I feel like Sh** and would like to run into a time machine like in FF8 and disappear. I'm just dead beat!!! I don't need to be rescued but just leave me alone......I want to speak with god (pause).

Got half day off today. I have to head home before the peak hours. Don't want to get caught in the traffic jam in this kind of condition. Sick and sickening. I swear, I don't need any swearing or foul words coming out from my mouth nor my mind...I've just found peace with god. Perhaps all these, he wants me to be near him. He wants me to confide in him. He wants to touch my soul and I want to hug 'something' like I want to feel 'something'...I don't know what it is...I just cry.

I locked myself in my room. I closed my eyes hopefully I'm able to composed myself before dinner. Don't want my parents worrying on me. I'm a big girl. I think I can handle it myself. I usually am. Hey, I'm Yuna am I not? Apart from god I go to, Final Fantasy is my secret playground I find my solace in it.

Real buddies

Real buddies, they say... We've been getting along so fine and within 3 weeks it hit us like a year. Yeah...its like we've known each other that long. Can't describe this relationship and I wonder if anyone out there faces the same like mine. We talk, we shun, we friend, we fight, we teach, we learn, we gives, we hold, we laugh, we cry, we tell, we keep...you name it! It is like best friends in real life. Except we've never met and we never speak. Hmm.what kind of relationship is that? More like a blind date ha? We have fun as internet buddies! Something new to me and perhaps him too. We enjoy each other companion. Sometimes I wonder if this going to last or short one. Well...will see.

Last night I had butterflies in my stomach. The night before he had asked if he could call? But no...not yet..I'm not ready. Don't want to spoil the fun we had with Instant Messenging. Both have been very naughty but if we found another way to communicate...will there be an extra fun or lost the fun, I wonder? ...so does he. But I cannot wait any longer...I'm getting tired of waiting already that I decided to text messages via phone. He could be sleeping...perhaps I'd give him a wake-up call. After half an hour... Hmmm...no reply? God! he must be sleeping again! Again, going to give him a ring instead. "Hello? Hello....?" AAaaargh, he answered! This is the first time I heard him. I was speechless for a second and my mind was thinking....thinking of 'nothing'...Gosh! what should I do? What should I say? My heart was beating fast and I couldn't breath. But that poor friend of mine might be thinking that I'm nuts or whatever...So I have to act fast and the words that blurted out from my mouth was a whispering "Its late". He assured me that he'll be online soon. The phone went dead. And I was glad it was over. I feel like my head was balooning and am not sure how should I react after this.

Just for a few second of verbal conversation...well, I think it was fun! A new discovery in our friendship. To which later we tried again. Maybe just to ease out our anxiety or perhaps a proper conversation this time. I don't know if it was ok. Though I was feeling shy over the scenario....might as well get we it over and done with. I just don't care what he thinks anymore as he probably feels the same way like I do...all mixed up and the embarresment we tried to saviour.

What a night to remember!!!

Kingdom Hearts

Curiousity kills the cat!.... I'm no cat but curious I am. When I found something, my brain will be tell me "Hey! what's this?" pushing my hands to get to do her work. The brain will initially telling my right fore finger to clicked at "it". My eyes to view at "it" and my brain will digest every words or pictures that laid in front of my eyes. Another department in my brain will be given another task on the reasoning part. Thats the toughest job to make me, Yuna, a better understanding or else all informations are just rubbish and will be stored away...until the day when Ms brain need to recall the so-called rubbish to be review and reformat.

I can't help myself wondering whats in store whenever I find a mystery box, puzzle box or a treasure box. My brain take any challenges to open, to discover, to emulate or going through any labyrinth of tunnels. The brain is working even harder. Her greatest satisfaction...her winning prizes!

Yuna have been warned to let the classified matters out of her jurisdiction and don't cross the line. But that crime scene need more investigation. Yuna needs to probe. Her reasoning department cannot rest, ordered by a hierarchy ...only god knows!

Out of respect and a promise, the only virtue that save his only life and soul spared. Any links that lead to open his Kingdom Hearts are left untouched...until HE, The Owner and The Master, gives the key to officialy unlock the most secret haven to be greeted with his welcoming desire which he had laid and planned...for Yuna to indulge.

Aaaah...I Love a happy endings! Meanwhile, Yuna can wait such enthusaism. I always keep this principal "Save the last for the best". Always dear! Always!

Quite alright!

I feel so heavy from my back all the way down and if I stand too long I feel lighter that I could fall. I think I'm catching a flu.

My relative from Malacca came yesterday afternoon and they all waited till I reached home. I was so happy to meet them as there were so many things to say to my cousins. When a distance relative comes it is usually about a wedding invitation. "Who is getting married" the first thing pop out from my mouth. It was so hilarious as they were pointing at me. "Ha? very funny " Too little time but too many things to catch up.

Last night, was the first time, I couldn't log in Cakapgold.com forum. I've been hearing some complaints regarding it this week. Oh well, just send text messages. Messages replied to let it be and rest assured that it will be ok soon.

I didn't meet Vincent last night but Leon Kennedy in Resident Evil 4, another handsome fellow. This game was so much fun right from the beginning. The title takes place in 2004 some six years after the events that transpired in Resident Evil 2. The government has destroyed the Umbrella Corporation, which has been behind just about every plot and disgusting bio-chemical mutation in the survival horror series. Now-US agent Leon Kennedy (of Resident Evil 2 fame) has been dispatched to Europe to save the President's daughter from "crazed organizations." half way playing...I just remembered someone..."Hello? where are you?" Hmmm, wondering which one should I keep up with? Leon or Squall? At least with Leon, he's ever here when I needed him. No problem indeed.

Last night has also kept me thinking ...to call or not to call...that is the question. Since Squall mentioned it....maybe he's wondering too. Took the risk but not to speak just to hear him breathing! I think that's quite alringht.

Misunderstanding

It was a bad move...I've read it 3 times to be sure. I sent a reminder but maybe a bit strong as I cannot take it anymore...spamming. My heart says 'Something is not right!' Have you ever played "Dororo" game before? Whenever Dororo senses something amiss, she'll warned her companion by saying "Something is not right!'. So Hiyakkimaru-san has to look for that clue. I let my inner instinct down that day...and I got a red flag! Ooops! I've never come across such a strong remarks before...not in my life...not where I was brought up...no such language ever drummed in my ears. Though I tried to blend or camouflaged myself to get used to these slang which often used in the local forum. I take my stride and able to accept my misunderstanding and apologies.

I was like in daze that evening...my brain keep recalling those scandalized words....even though a friend rest assured that it was just ok. "Maybe I'm not used to these"...."Maybe that is just what they are or what it is"..."Maybe its a norm thingy"...but it hurts. So I let it be. I've done my part.

To move away from this grey atmosphere I went out with my good friend for a window shopping, light dinner and some talks. It is always fun to be with her...she always has many many many things to say. Sometimes I wasn't listening but just watching her jibberishing with her words...when my brain is damn lazy to focus. Ha..ha..ha..."Sorry, Noraini!"

It was so late when he comes buzzing my PC screen. Sound alarming to check if I'm ok. I'm ok but my mind keep flasing out those incident. He sounds angry and dissapointed and I........I don't want anymore misunderstanding........especially from him. He always has his ways to say goodnight.....saving some small laughs for a happy endings. Thanks dear!

Ben Whatever!

Yuna has been busy lately. She crave for more knowledge in the cyberworld. It is like a new frontier travelling through space. Going from site to site, blog to blog, forum to forum to find out what's ticking and cooking. Well, her time is seasonal. At present, a hayday season, just do whatever I can to occupy my time. When the peak season comes, Yuna hardy lift up her head to see where she's going but madness of work. She's going to miss somebody....I know. Want to hear about Osama Ben Ladin's jokes? Ben busy! Ben sick! Ben here! Ben there! Ben everywhere! Ben whatever! Many many Ben I could think of :} Tee...hee...hee...(chuckling!).

Last night, I've had enough of playing Final Fantasy 12. I'm having problem going on to the next stage, the Tchita Uplands from the Phon Coast. I think something is wrong with the disc. I bought this game twice and still stuck at the same spot. I've finished the hunting missions, travelling through cities, building gils and collecting rare items. Now what? Ok..ok....so I grab 'Resident Evil 4'. Want to know something? Resident Evil was my first game I fell in love with when I first start using Playstation. The plots were cunning and so is the story line....you get so invovled in the mission. First time I felt having a gun in my hand! The best was Resident Evil 3! After that I'm hunger for more Resident Evils! Got frustrated when the next RE game can only be played on PS2. I've never been SO frustrated before. So while waiting to get my hand on PS2, I bought Final Fantasy 7. I wasn't sure at first because the characters were too small and the CG grahic were not like RE. But hey, soon I got hooked on to the FF7. The plots and story line were fantastic! Plus romantic! From then onwards I was hooked with all the Final Fantasy games. Can't help myself with all those handsome and beautiful characters in it. Can't help myself feeling having super strength and magics to fight with. Can't help myself falling in love like they did. Can't help myself ..oh what more I can say....I'm Yuna am I not?
The Dirge of Ceberus...I played Vincent that day...still half way through. Perhaps I'm going to meet him tonight. I heard he has the utmost super strenght than Cloud in the FF7. Vincent, Yuna wants to get to know you better!

Private person

Woke up with burst of energy...maybe looking forward to 'whatever' today. Feeling good and off to work I go. Hmmm...now my so-called-expired pass is working after all. So yesterday was really a Monday Blues day...everything seems not right.

I usually go to my favourite forum just before signing off for the day to catch up with some small laugh (if there is). It is like a therapy for me, to sleep with a smiling face. Have you ever wonder? Try it yourself...just go to any of your favourite website (not naughty & kinky sites) or Blog or read funny book...just a short one...just before bedtime. As you close your eyes you are already smiling...and on your way for your sweet dream. Yeah...sweet dream dear!

A quiet day today...not much to do but everything is calm and in order. Great isn't it? My appetite is slowly coming back to me after weeks of becoming bullimea. The smell, the sight and the thought of food when hunger pangs sprang, make me want to puke! It was fruit for breakfast, fruit for lunch and more fruit for dinner with a little bit of rice. To keep up with my daily routine, fruit juice. Wow! I lost some kilos....I'm sure my doctor is happy to see me the next time round. I did it without excercising (laughing my head off)! Oh yeah?

I'm in the mood for shopping today but I've already shopped last night. If only money grows on tree, I'd be climbing again. But I'm out of shushi at home...which I love to consume...especially california roll, anytime baby! I remember, at my apartment I used to cooked Teppenyaki with my special lemon grass chicken. The thought of those days make me craving for those early years where I was on my own and the freedom I felt like the world was so wide. Those days I look forward to go home, kick off my favourite shoes, let my hair down, dressed in whatever cloth I desired, lounged myself in my favourite bean bag either watch my favourite movies or joystick in my hand. Yes, I'm a private person. I do socialise but I'm more of a private person.

Indulgance! Indulgance!

Monday Blues

Not much to say today. Maybe it is just a Monday blues. Wasn't looking forward for any activities today and would like to switch my brain to "Thats not Compute!" or "Shut down operation". Need some times to upload :D

This morning I couldn't entered the office compound...my pass card has expired!And I'm already late. Received messages from my office colleague that soon there's a short meeting in the morning. Oh Brother! what a day. Luckily I'm able to enter the office building with my expired pass. Ironic isn't it? Get everything ready, postured and a little bit of touch-up before entering the conference room. It was just a briefing...from big boss to his immediate staffs which at present are just 3 out of 5. He'll be traveling tomorrow (YAHOO!). I have a couple of peanuts job to keep me busy this week.

A friend of mine put me on a wild goose chase today. I senses something its not right, so I stop immediately on the search. I found the clue he left at gmail. Very cute indeed! If I hadn't folllowed my instinct...I'd be surfing all day long! Mission accomplish! What else to do?

My brain is telling me "Keep my eyes open" but system on "moderate mode". It is just another Monday. Have fun!

The Long and Winding Road

The Long and Winding Road

The long and winding Road...been hearing this song from The Beetles of late. It touches my heart because somehow my journey in this world is still a long way to go. Reminising back the time during the age where I was happy and so in love. Those memories though long forgotten somehow flashing back to me ...its like I'm watching a black and white silent movie but pacing backwards. Maybe I'm trying to recall the slide where it end. Perhaps I may find the truth and the reason for that fall. "This is my story..." many times I heard Tidus saying it in FF10 and it look like; "Yuna, please don't denied your story" .

Yeah, "This IS my story!" I ponders back to those dark time and wondered if I had done something, to make that story live. Maybe I didn't give a change for him and myself to filled those void we left behind to be filled with answers, our hopes and our longings. We didn't say much...we didn't hold...we didn't cry...we didn't hug...we didn't kiss..we didn't..we didn't...we didn't..we didn't! I didn't cry when we split our ways, I was feeling disappointed back then but now I'm crying. "Darling, why didn't you just grabbed my hands and hold me close...we didn't have to say anything at all. I feel so lost and I want to hold on you so long and forever....."

If only I could turn back the time and do the right thing again and perhaps "My Story" is another story. I'm not looking back again this time and I'm not runnng back anymore. I have accepted now, my faith in me and god, the reasoning behind all these...may have a different happy endings.

Back to my mode...."Yuna".

What are friends for ?

Was it something I ate last night?
Was it another trigger reaction pinning me down so badly last night.
Don’t want to jeopardize with the prescriptions I have so the best thing to do is sleep.
Shut down my body system for awhile and hope Yuna is up and functioning again. Gosh…I have been sleeping for 2 hours but I feels like minutes.
I thought I’d give myself another 30 minutes before going back to rest…and shut all the system down.

Last night there were too many distractions and too many to handle all on my own. In fact, yesterday was like celebrating a ‘friendship day’ as too many new friends dropping by to say hello. But I’d rather talk with Squall for awhile…like there are many things too say....With Squall, we could go on and on chatting…lets say we just ‘click’. Maybe we have something in common. It’s the freedom we have and some secrets we keep. Maybe it is just plain ‘trust’ we have in our friendship. When he’s down, will try to cheer him up and when he’s lost, Yuna will try to guide him and when he’s nuts, I’ll tell him so. Well…at times we pulled each others’ hair and ‘whatever’ is our killing word. Good friends are hard to come by especially on the internet….where honesty and trust is so unlikely to happens. Hey Squall, what are friends for, right?
A friend to scream at, to shout at, to punch at, to laugh with, secrets to share with and to cry with.

Yuna couldn’t ask for more.

It has been more than 30 minutes I allowed myself to unwind before heading to my slumberland

Squall, thanks for lifting up my spirit when Yuna is sick. Maybe Yuna will look for "Air Cap Badak" (?) or whatever...at the store.

Break Away

Where would you go to take a short break to unwind 'whatever' you think it should?
Some would isolate itself into the bedroom domain and just do nothing the whole day.
Or indulge oneself to something out of ordinary from the everyday life....to break away!
Me? if there's only such place, an open wide space, lying on the field grass, alone and watch the moon and the stars! And ponder on the god's creation. It is too wide too spacious too serene and too pure may bring myself down back to the root. Who knows if I'm lucky, I'd be witnessing a shooting star! (hmmm...'Starlight' sung by Muse is drumming in my head now)
Running away and breaking away to places to do lots of thinking and decisions. To pursue your upcoming dreams and visualize your goals. To reorganise or retracing your plans and to check if its in order or in the best positions. To over come the short comings. To be able to log in to Plan B when Plan A seems to be deliruim.
Wow...that's a lot of thinking to do for breaking away right?
Yuna would rather just do nothing and free my mind from these cluthered decisions and relax. Watch movies..cry if I want to and shout if I want to. Hey, it is my open space! I'm breaking away and enjoy my freedomness!

Real Life Happiness

Everyone is looking for happiness. Actually 'happy' exist everywhere in space. Around us and in our heart. It is a therapy to some, a self cure for a sick mind, body and soul. I feel good when I'm happy. Who is not? I haven't heard from someone feeling so bad because he or she is feeling happy. Perhaps the guilt of stealing someone's happiness to make ones happy.
"When you're happy, I'm happy" it is a sporadic affair and it spread out within your perimeter, to give joy to someone you love and care, to give hope to someone who is in pain and lost.
Life is not necessary be about 'work!work!work!' and 'money!money!money!' It is about your journey from the day you are born till the day god take your hand to another plain.
Between that gap, fill your life with happiness as it lift your soul to be a better man. Your self satisfaction in that journey is the key to your real life happinesss.
Don't burden yourself with complicated matters or playing a role to make others happy when you're not.
I'm Yuna...I'm seeking as much happiness as I can...would you take these hands? Because in it, I have many many more spheres of happiness to share with.

Final Fantasy X2 - Good Ending

The Hymes

Hmmm...Hmmm...Hmmm......My head is singing this particular song since last night. It is from the Advent Children where you got to see it at the endings where Cloud is riding on his hot bike. That hansome dude always caught my eyes especially with his shade on. Even my grandma was 'wow-ing' at all these pretty smooth faces projected in the movie. Ah..what a sight! More! more! more! of Final Fantasy movies please! I can watch the Advent Children over and over again especially the fighting scenes. Hmm.. makes me feel like I'm Tifa fighting along side with Cloud-san. Pheewit! (whistling) Hmmm...Hmmmm...Hmmmm....
I still can't get this song out of my mind. I tried to catch or any glimpse appear on the screen regarding the song or who sang so that I could search it from the internet but in vain. It is japanese and only god knows the title of that song. Hmmmm...Hmmmm...Hmmmm...

Oh whatever...I'll just jibberish with some japanese words as long I'm enjoying singing the song. Perhaps it will stop.

Can anyone help? Please let me know...Hmmm...Hmmm...Hmmm...

Bored

Today it is just me and my Australian big boss. I've finished compiling the latest informations for the Company's database and the 2007 Directory. It will be printed soon. I've got another Yankee's database to do but that can wait. The yankee stopped by just to greet making sure if I'm ok. Yes, I'm ok... (especially whenever I looked into his deep blue eyes ...sometimes I get lost too hmmm aaaahh). No, I'm not flirting but just can't help it when this Chris Daughtry's resemblance (American Idol 2006) walked to me and gives his warmly welcome and goodbye. There's another deep blue eyes demon at my office too. Mr Nice Guy like Mel Gibson...except he has silver hair. Had a good conversation with him this morning showing off his blackberry and saying that with all the latest gadgets...the world is never sleep. My big boss will occasionally talk to me...mostly about work. Hmmm what a boring day especially when all is done according to the plan. The cutest guy at the office, our legal officer who always clad in black & white, a filipino....he's so much fun to talk to...always cheerful and smiling. But when all the short conversations end...boredom luring back to my senses. It is really killing me to wait...and wait.....and..wait...Can't just sit around doing nothing. Tried reading, surfing, listening to the music...even the office phone look dead...(no ringging). The Koreans don't mix unless they really really need my assistance...Aha! got you Robin! I thought you were a nerd but actually a pretty shy guy. One may think that I'm actually having a good time at the office. Excuse me! I'm bored to death. I need some distraction to kill this boredom!!!!

p.s. Can't wait to go home ...sob!sob!sob!

Kiroro: Mirae

When your connection is down, your world is down too. You panic, and life is not the same anymore. Last night was a quiet one. Plug in MP3 to hear the FF themes orchestra and some songs. Closing my eyes and hopefully be able to sleep. I listen to these music everyday. At home and at work. It makes me calm and in control in whatever I do. I've been listening to "Mirae" many times.

Those were the days...Mirae was just another sentimental song that I love until he found it by chance and dedicated it to me. Now I hear it in a different way. I still don't know what it means as it is in japanese but I feel I know what it is. Closing my eyes and I want to hear it again and again and again and again and again and again and again.....

p.s. Tidus lets take up japanese shall we?

Age Factor

Our plan is plain and simple. No ups and no down...totally on neutral ground. Just enjoy each others companionship and have fun. Such peremptory.

Does age matter? Perenially, Yuna is cast as a 17 year old young summoner, daughter of Lord Braska. Though young, she's capable of making her decision and destiny.

Yet she's been frequently questioned by a few, of her age. Not wanting to be seen as too young and naive, she chose to be 27. If by virtue, Tidus is supposed to be 17 and she had to be 27. Oh well.., age does not matter as long as she have her guardiances beside her willingly to battle along the way until she reaches her final destination, Zanarkand.

Filled with the many memories of her journey, Yuna speaks to the people of Spira:
“The people and the friends we have lost, or the dreams that have faded... Never forget them.”

Tidus, Yuna is aware that you've been to the secret lairs. Those codes are carefully laid right from the beginning. No one is good at this game but Yuna herself. Keep guessing if you like...
Thank you for the laughter :D You win!

Reaching out to you

I'm reaching out to you but in a different way. If you are willing to take this hand of a special friendship we had or have been. Don't want to be confused again and get lost in this virtual world. Can we start all over again and have fun? I don't want to hurt you in many ways. I miss those days where it was full of fun and laughter. I like that Ben! At least respect my wish and I respect yours.

OIHY

Candle in the dark

It is about a 'candle' he said that has kept me wondering all night long.

I'm tired and I'm out of tune due to today's prankster abusing my sacred window. I tried to laugh but I really can't at all. It is like stripping away whatever I have, I hold on to. I felt so hollow...nothing. Oh, what can I say?

My nightly rendezvous somehow turn out to be, from enjoyment to addiction and now complicated. I wonder if its ok to call it quit before its too late. I'm sorry if its too frightening for me I have to let it go. I once mentioned not too close or you'll get burned. Being a candle...you are what you are. Can't I be "Like a candle in the dark" ?

As I was about to sleep I heard George Micheal singing "...caused losing everything is like the sun going down on me " inspired me to write. Otherwise the total darkness will block my brain. I cannot think of any then. Though its late, I better let it out off my chest before its gone. Tomorrow is a new day. My friend if you're not happy with my answers to your queries, I'm not happy either. I know you're trying very hard to be near me but what is the point when in long terms I won't be there. Who's going to light your candle then? I rest my case.

So I'm leaving behind the thought of 'candle' you pushed me to think. I didn't enjoy every bit thinking of it. It is up to you. Your world has so much to offer. You still have a long trip to go before you finally settle down on a finest green. Mine, the time spend is limited and I can't go further as you are. When the time comes, I just want to be known as Yuna. I hope you'd understand.

No wonder Cloud-san is oh so serious at every Fantasies (FF7 & Advent Children). We both share the same Fantasy.
Cloud-san can't we put that burden behind for a while to make someone happy? Lets share the candle then.